Happy Wednesday my friends! I'm not gonna lie, it's been a little busy lately, so I'm most definitely behind on my blog posts. But, I decided that I shouldn't allow the perfect to be the enemy of the good. This is one of my favorite quotes recently; brought to you by co-hosts, Liz and Sarah of "Happier in Hollywood;" a podcast about surviving and thriving in Hollywood. I obviously do not live in Hollywood, but this statement has such intentional meaning for me. One of my biggest issues, is being a perfectionist. Anyone else struggle with this? I have a feeling you're all sitting there nodding your heads in agreement. I find that it is extremely common for most women. I'm not even really sure why, but it has plagued me since childhood. In fact, it has been such a huge presence in my life, it is one of the reasons it took me six months to hit the "post" button on my first blog. Isn't that insane? Why do I feel the need to make sure everything is perfect? Even when I read, and re-read, it's never really absolutely perfect; because I'm not absolutely perfect. And doesn't that feel more relatable anyway? Who wants to be friends with someone who's perfect? Not me! So, it seems a little silly to focus so heavily on it.
Not only have I had to do a ton of internal work to practice being imperfect and being okay with "good enough;" I have also struggled with comparison. I know you're definitely nodding in agreement now. This is one of the most common feelings to have as small business owner, friend, colleague, daughter, mother, wife, etc. And social media never helps with that. Social media represents the "perfect" moments. That makes sense doesn't it? You don't want to post a picture of yourself looking a hot mess, disheveled, imperfect. You want your Instagram or Facebook feed to look curated and balanced. Doesn't it throw a wrench in the aesthetic when you add a photo that shows your flaws, messy hair, crazy kitchen, unfolded laundry, etc. But guess what? That's the real you. No ones home is beautiful all the time. No ones hair is perfectly styled all the time. And don't even get me started on laundry (insert monkey eye hiding emoji). Imperfections are what make you the person you are. Imperfections are what made my husband fall in love with me and my very best friends to understand me the best. You could even say that your imperfections are what make you "perfectly" you. Why compare your imperfect to someone else's perfect.
This feeling of comparison and imperfection came up at a recent photoshoot. I had two
extremely adorable Christmas photoshoots in Tallahassee over the weekend (Go Noles!). The lighting wasn't exactly as I expected. The greenery was brighter than I anticipated. The posing wasn't "perfect." I had just spent that morning combing through Instagram for posing inspiration. And sure enough, the poses I had envisioned weren't executed exactly as I imagined. I was somewhat frustrated with myself in the moment. Why don't my pictures turn out exactly as I want them to? Why can't I provide exceptional instruction that decreases ambiguity? Why am I not perfect? I will answer all these questions for you! Because perfect is not me. When I got my camera home and uploaded my photos, I fell in love. They were even better than I anticipated. Yes, I had to adjust my greens and decrease my highlights a little bit. Yes, I had to do some cropping. Yes, the poses weren't exactly as I imagined. But, they were perfectly mine! And my clients were extremely happy with the outcome. I find the more I stress about a photoshoot, the more difficult it is to get a product that I am truly happy with. My worry takes over, and it is very obvious that I am worried in my session. My clients pick up on that. They feed off my energy.
I am slowly learning that being myself and having fun in a photoshoot is far more important than the "perfect" pose, lighting, or outfit. My clients want to work with ME. They want to experience imperfect Kelsey. This realization has truly been a kick in the butt for me. I had to share, because I know I am not the only person in business or otherwise who experiences this feeling on occasion. Perfectionism can be a truly crippling thing. Remember that you are awesome! Remember that you are imperfectly you! Remember that you are also not alone in this feeling!
I hope this finds you well, my friends! Cheers to being vulnerable and realizing imperfect is better than perfect!